ODE TO HOME

It is an interesting phenomenon, to leave, to travel, to wander, to come back. My journey to the United States was not an easy one: it was the first time I left home. Although I have always travelled, for weeks at a time, and enjoyed my short and long vacations all around the world, Lebanon is truly the only real home I have ever known and the place to which I have always had a strong sense of belonging.

Today, three years into my long adventure, I cannot deny the vast baggage of experiences I have gained. Yet, I feel as if I have missed out on so many important milestones back in Lebanon, specifically with regards to my younger sister and only sibling Ayla. Fate and an age gap of seven years with Ayla, made it that I had to go through my teens by myself: there was no sibling to relate or reach out to for support and understanding. I always thought that Ayla would have me beside her to guide her through all the teenage trials and tribulations.  As destiny would have it, I am far away, and I am left to watch her coming of age from a distance, only to be included moments at a time with the heavy guilt of not being as present as she, and I, would want.

 I wish I could be here and there. So, I am left with bitter sweet feelings of nostalgia and sometimes of sadness, but also invigorating feelings of curiosity and excitement that draw me back into my experience. This constant tug between my two worlds has prompted me to celebrate every moment I spend in both my homes and to bask in the now wherever I am. 

Since Philadelphia is where I live for now, and where I spend most of my days, my final project is a photographic homage to some of the most important people in my life, those that have always been by my side, as well as an homage to the three childhood homes in which I grew up: their elaborate walls, their nurturing rooms and their emotion-evoking sceneries.